Cunning linguists provide succour to rejected Busty

busty idolFirst the bad news. Sadly I didn’t even make it to the shortlist for the $25,000 Pornhub Cares Scholarship, as apparently, “although we were impressed with your experience, the calibre of applicants was so high that on this occasion we cannot offer you an interview, but we will keep your details on file if something suitable comes up in the future”. Bah.
So, of course, the good news is that you will still be able to read my words of wisdom for the foreseeable future. Mind you, I hear that, with the Campaign Diary relaunching, competition is hotting up. Yeah right.
If this week’s offering is anything to go by – some adland bore found a dead deer on his palatial estate and Mother has made some socks for Theresa May – I don’t think I will be losing that much sleep.
Anyway, as they say, as one door is slammed in your face, another one opens. And so it was this week when I received an email from CamSoda – which is apparently a leading adult entertainment platform – announcing the launch of “Language Lessons”, a language learning programme featuring successful, entrepreneurial cam models as personal tutors schooling users in an assortment of languages.
Through private paid sessions users interact with native-speaking models who will help improve speaking skills, reading comprehension, pronunciation and provide general cultural knowledge about mannerisms, etiquette and body language, and at the same time get to gawp at them starkers.
“At CamSoda, we understand that learning a new language can be quite cumbersome and programmes like Rosetta Stone are far too cookie cutter and expensive. With Language Lessons, users can interact with an intelligent model who is equally beautiful as she is a cunning linguist and dick-tate each lesson as they see fit,” said Daryn Parker, vice-president of  CamSoda. “Whether it be sensual conversation or quick vocabulary quiz, our private tutors are flexible and amenable to teaching users in a manner that works best for them – breasts, butts and vaginas included.” Hmm.
Surely with my French skills, unrivalled good looks and big charms, there must be an opening for little ol’ me?

You can also follow Busty on Twitter @BustyIdol

 

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