Job market goes from the sublime to the ridiculous

busty idolWell, I am almost embarrassed to report that you lovely Busty fans have been making me blush this week with your recommendations for my Pornhub Cares Scholarship job application.
Phrases like “she has changed my life forever”, “the world would be a much poorer place without her” and “I always look forward to a Busty Bonus” are very much appreciated, although not everyone has been quite so gushing. One wag wrote: “She certainly knows how to polish a turd”. Charming.
Not that I am actively looking for a new job, you understand, I love it here but sometimes, just sometimes an opportunity emerges that is simply too good to resist.
I am not too sure, however, that a new vacancy at Marketing Week quite falls into that category.
Apparently they are looking for someone to help out the editorial team on a fixed term three days a week contract, and I quote: “The ideal candidate will gain valuable experience working on a busy news desk and will be tasked with writing news stories, helping out with social media, sourcing pictures and building newsletters.” (In other words, working your arse off and doing all the shite jobs no-one else wants to do while all and sundry flounce in an out of editorial meetings.)
And what, I hear you ask, will the successful candidate get? Well, a whole hour for lunch and £9.75 an hour, which works out at about £200 a week. Mind you, even that’s more than I get here…
Still, one man who has landed on his feet this week is David Clark, who has just been appointed “head of making it happen” at creative agency London Advertising – you know them, they’ve just hired the gorgeous Suzi Ray, too. Cue much hilarity on LinkedIn, although perhaps the inimitable Drayton Bird summed it up best by writing: “I’m going to drag someone off the street – preferably with a slavering dog -and make them Head of Ludicrous at our firm.”
As job titles go, it’s up their with wet leisure attendant (lifeguard), media distribution officer (paperboy), education centre nourishment consultant (dinner lady) and vision clearance engineer (window cleaner).
Of course, this hasn’t gone unnoticed here at Decision Marketing, where I have been given the new job title of “goddess of garbage” by my esteemed boss. Pretty hurtful don’t you think?
Funnily enough, he has promoted himself to “El Presidente”…but suffice to say he will always be “head of stumbling around the office pissed as a fart” to me.

You can also follow Busty on Twitter @BustyIdol

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