You know, the older I get, the more the nation’s youth start to irritate me. I know that this is not a pleasant trait, and I wish, oh how I wish, I could be more tolerant but WHY, OH WHY ARE THEY ALL SO USELESS AT VIRTUALLY EVERYTHING?
And there I was thinking maybe I was being a bit harsh on a whole generation when up popped an email from energy company Hive (any port in a storm as the weather has suddenly improved this morning and I need to get out in it sharpish to save my sanity).
Apparently they have conducted a poll among the parents of the marketing industry’s prized Generation Z and discovered levels of incompetence not seen since Liz Truss waltzed into Number 10. (Please note: I didn’t say she crashed the economy as she’s already sent a legal letter to Keir Starmer demanding he stops making that “false and defamatory” claim.)
Still, back to the youngsters, who it seems have a catalogue of basic life skills that they have never done, with putting up a shelf (42%), cleaning a loo (39%) and ironing clothes (37%) all ranking high.
Changing a lightbulb (35%) and even operating the washing machine (34%) leave modern youngsters scratching their heads, while a third (31%) of parents say their teen would struggle to cook a spag bol – and as many as 30% have never created a budget and stuck to it.
Meanwhile, 26% wouldn’t know how to pay a bill, 24% have no idea how to book an appointment at the doctor or even turn the heating on (22%).
Then there are the 24% who can’t boil an egg, make their own bed (20%), change a duvet cover (19%), or make small talk with a stranger (19%).
In fact over half (55%) of all parents insist their kids are “wonderful, but a bit useless”.
One in four (23%) go a step further and admit their child is ill equipped for life outside of the family home, because they spend too much time scrolling on their phone (49%), haven’t been exposed to real life problems (45%), are unable to do basic things (44%) and they get everything done for them (35%).
On average, teens ask their parents how to do things eight times a month.
All of which makes you wonder why the marketing industry is so obsessed with targeting them, even though they are the future.
More importantly, it makes the old soak (that’s the esteemed editor of this august online empire to you lot) look almost competent. (Surely, this is enough arse-licking to get that bloody pay review through by now!)
Have a great weekend!
Foxy has ditched X but is still on Instagram, just don’t get too excited as I’m never there
