Idol Gossip

Was it really only a week ago that I was basking in the afterglow of my trip of a lifetime…

“All of the people around us they say, Can they be that close, Just let me state for the record,…

“Everybody dance, do-do-do, Clap your hands, clap your hands, Everybody dance, do-do-do Clap your hands, clap your hands…” Yep, it’s…

As the gloom descends once again and the country stumbles down the dreaded steps back to Covid hell, I must…

So, having avoided a libel battle with the Right Honourable Halfwit – guess it must all be true then, unless for…

“We’re up all night ’til the sun, We’re up all night to get some, We’re up all night for good…

“Everybody dance, do-do-do, Clap your hands, clap your hands, Everybody dance, do-do-do Clap your hands, clap your hands…” Yep, forget…

At last, the August Bank Holiday looms and, with it, my first day off in months. You know, I do…

Ever get the feeling someone’s after you? Well, you want to try doing my job for a few hours and…

So, it transpires that our new recruit, Peggy from Skeggy, is on to something with her love of the Merlot….

Phew, what a scorcher! (OK, I admit it’s at least the fifth time this column has used that as an…

So, there we were all set for the Great Escape, a foray to Fanny, followed by a tour of the…

“Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, Rollin’, rollin’, rollin’, Rawhide!” Yep, we’re all set for The Decision Marketing Bus Tour…

“Over hill, over dale, Thorough bush, thorough brier, Over park, over pale, Thorough flood, thorough fire; I do wander every…

Well, here we are again. Another week, and more marvellous musings to dispatch before I can have a well earned…

Ever woken up worrying that you said the wrong thing the night before? Felt annoyed with yourself for polishing off…

Phew, what a scorcher! While the world and his wife, husband, civil partner, lover, friend with benefit, and office affair, along…

So, one week in and our bubble of love is still going strong, and so is my man, Desperate Dan…

Well, it was set to be a long old week at the Decision Marketing Nerve Centre we all call home,…

With Masturbation Month reaching its 744-hour climax on Sunday (eat your heart out Sting and Trudie), I must admit I’ve been…

So, how’s your International Masturbation Month going? If that’s the first you’ve heard of it, you’d better crack on, you’ve…

Ever get the feeling you’re the only fatty left in the world? I blame Adele. Her new skinny minnie figure…

What’s accessible yet assertive, zesty and bold, and big with ample body and a great finish? No, no, no, not…

Well, this Friday Bank Holiday lark has certainly buggered up my schedules that’s for sure. Not that I’m complaining, you…

So, with Foxy Over A Barrel – my new premium craft ale – now bottled and primed, and the next…

Hi-Diddle-Dee-Dee a brewer’s life for me. That’s right fans, my new craft ale “Foxy over a Barrel” is coming along…

So, how’s the WFH going (week five)? Well, I’m hanging on in there, luckily I didn’t get out much anyway,…

So, how’s the WFH going (week four)? Well, at least the weather is on the up, even though to go…

So, how’s the WFH going (week three)? I must admit, I’m getting a bit bored of all these people in…

So, how’s the WFH going (week two?) That is, if you’re lucky enough to still have a job. I must…

So, how’s the WFH going? Bored out of your skull yet? Still battling with the best strategy to adapt to…

So, girls, how was your International Women’s Day? I must admit, Desperate Dan – my Southern Softie who’s hard in…

So, girls, are you looking forward to International Women’s Day? A chance to celebrate the sisterhood, show those pesky men…

Back in the day, when I was a spotty teenager on work experience at the Bolton Evening News (bet you’d…

O ye of little faith (and me for that matter). Just when I thought Valentine’s was passing me by for…

“You’re my funny valentine, Sweet comic valentine, You make me smile with my heart.” Yeh right, there’s about as much…

Well, did you enjoy your four-day week? What do you mean you don’t know what I am banging on about…

Well, me and my big gob. No sooner had I expressed an interest in the TradWife lifestyle, than my email…

Ever felt like giving it all up girls and becoming a Tradwife? I must admit, I hadn’t until this week’s…

Well, we’ve rifled off our proposal and now we’re awaiting confirmation of the “tissue meeting” from Harry and Megan; c’mon…

Haaaaaaaappy New Year to all; I hope you had a great break. I’d like to say my batteries are now…

“Have a holly, jolly Christmas, It’s the best time of the year, I don’t know if there’ll be snow, But…

So, I am guessing that there’s no chance we will be getting a four-day week any time soon then. Still,…

It’s beginning to look a lot like Christmas, Everywhere you go, Festive songs are blurting out, But under the tree…

You know sometimes, dear readers, I sit here in the “Decision Marketing Nerve Centre” – otherwise known as McKelvey’s front…

So, I have finally got my golden ticket to the biggest event of the year and I am pleased to…

So, one week in to my new self-partnering life and, to be honest, even I am getting a bit bored…

Swing low, sweat chariot my arse…who likes rugby anyway? Yep, you guessed it, I was only a temporary fan but…

“Swing low, sweet chariot, Coming for to carry me home, Swing low, sweet chariot, Coming for to carry me home…”…

“Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear m-e, happy birthday to me!” Yep, would you believe…