Busty goes down well at the DMAs

“Oh what a night, Me and my man in Room 163, You wouldn’t believe what he did to me, Oh oh oh what a night.” Yep, you guessed it, the DMA Awards were another top night for little ol’ Busty.
The glitz, the glamour, the choir, the flame throwers, and, to top it off nicely, I even managed to rekindle my very own fire with the account man I met last year.
One minute I was chewing the fat with Foxy and Blondy from Lida – the jewel (or should that be vajazzle?) in the M&C Saatchi crown – the next, I was being swept off my feet once more by their smooth-tongued colleague.
Not that Blondy seemed too chuffed about it to be honest, I reckon maybe our Nicks was a little green eyed. Then again, I think she was still reeling from her appearance as a “shaven Maven” in the DMA’s copywriting film, bemoaning the fact that they had cut it to make her look mouthy. Getoutahere.
Luckily, my esteemed editor was soon on hand – isn’t he always when there’s a blonde about? – to give her some soft soaping, leaving me to slink off with Mr Lida.
Old McKelvey was working the room faster than the official photographer (I know money’s tight so maybe he was doing a spot of moonlighting). No sooner had he sat down between Mike Colling and Tristan from the DMA, than he was up again looking for someone else to harass. Mind you, five minutes with Colling is usually more than enough I hear.
At least our host for the evening, Jason “manhood” Manford, resisted the temptation to do his own bit of harassing when The Sun – the scurrilous rag which outed him as a chubby chaser – picked up loads of awards. Very professional.
The champagne was soon flowing on the Wunderman table and even the newly-loved-up Mel Crankshaft or Brown or Edwards or whatever she’s called these days cracked a smile.
Elsewhere, Rapp were partying like it was 1999, although you couldn’t blame them; that was probably the last time they scooped four golds, two silvers and a bronze. Meanwhile Soul were enjoying themselves too, even though all they went home with was a huge bill. Mike Cullis is still the best looking man in DM though…
As for me, well, suffice to say I didn’t quite make it back to room 101 at the Easy Hotel in Croydon. Round the corner in a rather plusher establishment Mr Lida took me through the agency mantra of “we take a brand promise and make it personal. Creating better customer connections through direct channels”.
We connected for hours, and I’m sure you will believe me when I tell you, he was very direct and very personal too…

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