“We’re up all night ’til the sun, We’re up all night to get some, We’re up all night for good fun, We’re up all night to get lucky.” Seven days in, dear Foxy fans, and my quest to go up and down the Nile (Rodgers) is looking brighter by the hour.
Not that the musical genius knows anything about my plans for him to be “In Bed With Foxy”, but apparently the wheels are in motion, and my people (those lovely PRs to stars Pumpkin UK) are in talks with his people and, you never know, we could soon be getting it on.
As Nile once collaborated, while Pharrell mused: “We’ve come too far to give up who we are, So let’s raise the bar and our cups to the stars.”
Someone who’s not quite so cheery this week is little big man The Right Honourable Lord Alan Sugar (of Chigwell), who has finally blown the gaff on his somewhat controversial – some might say thick as shit – opinions on the coronavirus pandemic.
You see, not so long ago Little Al took to Twitter to share a message with his millions of followers, claiming to be from Japanese Professor Dr Tasuku Honjo, that suggested Covid-19 did not occur naturally or come from bats but was manufactured in a laboratory.
Following an outcry, the miniature peer deleted the tweet but remained defiant, responding: “I just passed it on. I didn’t write it.” He then added: “Looks like, to quite [quote] Donald Trump that was fake news…”
Then in June, the Right Honourable Halfwit appeared on Jeremy Vine’s Channel 5 show via video link from his home in Florida, and said: “Look, I’m not a doctor and I don’t want to be giving medical advice and all that stuff. The only thing I can say is that I have been here in Florida for six months and so I have lived through the crisis. The shortage of ventilators, the no masks available, the no body wear available, the hospital beds being full up, blah blah blah.
“This has been going on now for six weeks, so I just logically say, well hold on, six weeks, we’ve come out of this so called lockdown. Who’s dead? I’m not, I’m still alive. My wife, thank god, is still alive, so’s everybody else I know. No one else has caught anything.” (Guess you don’t personally know the 28.2 million people who have caught it then, Shorty, or the million who have died so far?)
Still, the best is yet to come as you may have noticed over the past few weeks that Little Al has started to turn his attention to those who have been working from home – or skiving as he likes to call it. And I quote: “Those people who like working from home have become a bit complacent, I think, quite honestly. My businesses have all come back. I think there’s a fine line of fearful and enjoying it, to be honest with you. It’s as simple as that. What are they fearful of?”
He then added: “I’ve got a factory down the road from here that has 300 people that have been working all throughout the pandemic.” No doubt.
But could it be because The Right Honourable Buffoon’s central London property investments are suffering due to office workers staying home? After all, it just so happens that the itsy-bitsy billionaire is a long-term investor in prime City property through real estate venture Amsprop, which was behind the redevelopment of The Crosspoint near Liverpool Street Station (tumbleweed anyone?), and its portfolio includes The Lever Building near Barbican (ditto?).
Maybe it’s just a coincidence, but one thing’s for sure, bitter Sugar is not being lined up as a candidate for “In Bed With Foxy”…