I must admit, I’m cock-a-hoop this week; the bids are all in for the “Big Night In With Busty” and I’m fingering through them now. One lucky guy – sorry to disappoint you girls but I’m not a ‘vagitarian’ – is just a phone call away from the night of his life, and I’m just a phone call away from creating my summer wardrobe…can’t wait.
My wish-list reads like a designer girl’s wet dream. But Gucci, Chanel, D&G, Prada, Armani, Versace, Dior, Valentino and Fendi don’t come cheap, unless you go to Petaling Street Market in Kuala Lumpar, so my hot date has to have a massive…wallet, and a huge…bank balance.
And the joker who sent in that bid of a fiver – you know who you are and so do I – knows exactly where to shove it. He can also expect a nice letter through the post addressed to his wife…us girls have to stick together. You see Cilla, I can embrace the ‘muffia’ when it suits…
Talking of suits, I’ve been dusting down my corset, stockings and tits tassels for a reprise of Burlesque Busty. That’s right chaps, the National Trust have decided the only way to boost their flagging visitor numbers is to ask me to put on one of my world famous shows. Out go the antimacassars, in comes Busty.
So this weekend I’m off to Killerton House, an 18th century home set in a 6,400 acre estate near Exeter, best known for its collection of historical costumes. And I’m making a guest appearance with the Plymouth-based group called Kitty’s Dolls Burlesque, who also provide pole dancing performances.
To be honest, I’m not too sure they know what they’re letting themselves in for, but, hey, who am I to argue? I may even grab myself some landed gentry.
In the meantime, I’ve also been having lots of fun with BeautifulPeople.com, the so-called “elite online club, where every member works the door”. Hmm, not too sure about working the door, those guys can work any part of me they like.
The site claims many of its “members have found lasting love”; I’m not after love, of course, but so long as their members can last in the bedroom, they’re in, so to speak.
Sadly the recruitment site it says it’s launching has yet to materialise, but, hey, I’m more than willing to keep browsing until that appears…
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