Blimey, I’ve had a right week of it. No sooner had I recovered from the dirtiest weekend I’ve had in ages, than I was up to my eyeballs in it at this week’s Data Strategy Awards (yeh, I didn’t think they were still going either)…
Anyway, more of that later; first the weekend. So, as you may recall, my new client, Steve Wonkey at the Three-legged Donkey Sanctuary in Bolton, had invited me up North to “celebrate our working relationship”.
Having been there a few weeks ago I was expecting another romantic night, Bolton-style. Kicking off at Sally’s with a chip-barm (why does everything come in bread up there?), we would wander down to Fanny’s, have a couple at the Spread Eagle, then a cosy ruby at Hot Chilli, and finally back to the sanctuary for some ass play.
But oh how wrong can a girl be? Of course I should’ve smelt a rat when Steve picked me up from the station and asked if I’d brought my water-proofs, as “don’t thou know it’s always reet pissin’ down oop here, chuck”. I chose not to reveal that I’d only packed my PVC outfit…
And it soon became apparent that his way of celebrating our new working relationship was slightly different what I’d had in mind, especially when he introduced me to his missus, Bertha, who it transpires had been away on my previous visit.
My god they build them big up there – initially I thought she was Peter Kay in drag – and she didn’t take too kindly to me tipping up in my 6-inch Kurt Geiger’s either. Her idea of a girly night in was watching me on my knees cleaning out the Aga.
It certainly was a dirty weekend alright – I spent most of my time knee-deep in shit, mucking out donkeys as she introduced me to the day to day workings of an animal sanctuary. And to think I went into this agency lark for the glamour…
Luckily there was plenty of glamour at last night’s Data Strategy Awards though, yeh right. The James Bond theme had got me all excited; sadly Daniel Craig couldn’t make it, although there were plenty of data geeks who thought they were 007. Licence the thrill? Are you having a laugh?
Mind you, the “name the Bond theme” competition did somewhat backfire on account of everyone in the room rushing for their smartphones. The PRs were out in force too, even the silvery-tongued slight man from Sligo – that’s Eulogy boss Adrian Brady to the rest of you – turned up…
Talking of PR. Nice to see Danny Rogers hasn’t forgotten how to talk about himself now he’s on Campaign, publishing a story – and an online link – about how he’d been interviewed by John Humprys on Radio 4. Come back Claire, all is forgiven…
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