“Happy birthday to me, happy birthday to me, happy birthday dear m-e, happy birthday to me!” Yep, would you believe it, it’s my special day today – The BIG 30 – and here I am being forced to write this nonsense…
First up, though, big hugs in advance for all your cards and pressies – not that I have got any yet but, hey, I am guessing the postie is running a bit late as he has to haul them all up from the sorting office down in the town.
Mind you, he had better get a shift on as my esteemed bosses, “Not so Fatty” and “Not so Fatter” (annoyingly their diets seem to be going well) are threatening to buy me a slap-up lunch (no doubt they will be just eating dust).
With this in mind I have been scouring the world to find something vaguely amusing to write about – and sharpish – when luckily our friends at Pornhub (remember them?) have come speeding to the rescue.
And with the joys of Halloween looming, an event that combines revealing costumes, screaming, partying, and a dash of the occult for good measure, where else could you get such titbits?
According to their insight team, searches on Pornhub for Halloween spiked up by an impressive 2,245% around October 31 last year, followed by “Halloween costume” and the equally festive “trick or treat” with increases of 1,785% and 1,477% respectively.
“Costume” searches were also up by 891% and, interestingly, it seems that Pornhub users prefer the scary to the sweet. Searches for spookier characters like “devil”, “vampire” and “zombie” were up 864%, 743%, and 460% while even “schoolgirl”, “superhero” and “cheerleader” saw rises of 267%, 236% and 162% respectively.
Apparently people start getting into the spirit pretty early, with searches starting to stir from mid-October, shooting up on the 29th and remaining rock hard for nearly two days.
Mind you, I do quite fancy some of that for my birthday treat, so I had better get a shift on. Have a good weekend!