Oh, bigmouth, la bigmouth, la bigmouth strikes again

foxy 414Appalled. Outraged. Repulsed. Disgusted. Incensed. Fuming. Yes, dear readers, I am also infuriated about events this week. But it’s not the prorogation of Parliament, nor Prince Andrew’s alleged behaviour, nor even the fact that my granddad’s favourite team, the Shakers – that’s Bury FC for all of you Southern Softies – have been booted out of the football league.
No, Foxy fans, it is the fact that ever since I got home from my “French Adventure”, The Drum has started to infiltrate my Facebook page with a new ad campaign promoting one of its numerous awards schemes.
I guess I am partly to blame for bemoaning our lesser rivals last week and concluding that it was “almost enough to make you pine for the fascinating LinkedIn feed of The Drum’s Gordon Young”.
Now, whether it is Facebook’s clandestine algorithms or that I am being singled out because The Drum is one of my obsessions, I can’t tell you. One thing is for certain, however, and that is with over 20 awards schemes and counting (including gongs for everything from best tying of a shoelace to best opening of an envelope) my Facebook feed is likely to be violated for months.
Me and my big mouth.
Mind you, having a gob on you does come in useful sometimes (just ask Dropshadow Dickie, The Man with the Golden Tongue, Rogering Rog, Calamity Clive and Marauding Mike).
Talking of which, I hear “the Marauder” has recently secured another Spanish tax dodge, er, I mean property investment. (Well, everything’s going cheap at the moment due to Brexit jitters.)
According to the blurb: “Overlooking Spain’s exclusive El Chaparral Golf Course, this exclusive Resort & Club Townhouse Development has just been launched in Mijas Costa.
“This development brings each owner the luxurious resort style living to their home through the numerous amenities the project has to offer. Only a stone’s throw away from the area’s Blue Flag beaches, this exclusive townhouse development [yep, you’ve already said that] boasts contemporary features and blends itself seamlessly into the environment.
“Featuring stunning sea views that can be enjoyed 365 days a year under the warm Costa del Sol sunshine.”
To be honest, I couldn’t care less about golf, and I know I have only just got back from a fortnight of Orgy and Anus (in the Bourgogne-Franche-Comté region of France, of course), but if I don’t get an invite to the Mijas Costa soon I really will be appalled, outraged, repulsed, disgusted, incensed and fuming.