And now the end is near and so I face, the final curtain. Yes, dear Foxy fans, it is with a heavy heart and a tear in my eye that I have to report I’ve decided to throw in the towel, give up the ghost or wave the white flag; maybe all three.
Four years and 200 award-winning columns since I succeeded my dear cousin Busty, I’m finally bowing out from the Decision Marketing Nerve Centre to pursue the other love of my life.
Now, it is a little known fact that us girls have been active in brewing since ancient times. And I’m not talking about the 1960s and 1970s either, I’m talking way before that when even John Watson and Drayton Bird were young, 7000 BC.
According to archaeologists, women were responsible for the first homebrew, found in the Neolithic settlement of Jiahu and made from a combination of honey mead, mixed with a concoction of rice. Sounds worse than Carling Black Label.
One dusty old manuscript I managed to unearth (well, Wikipedia) claims that from the earliest evidence of brewing, until the commercialisation of brewing during industrialisation, women were the primary brewers on all inhabited continents. In many cultures, the deities, goddesses and protectors of brewers were female entities.
And, now that I myself have reached goddess status (IMHO obviously), it seems the perfect opportunity to expand on the Foxy Over A Barrel brand, which went down so well during the pandemic that everyone who drank it forgot about Covid (and who they were, where they lived and their name, too).
The brand also just so happens to share my own attributes of being accessible yet assertive, zesty and bold, and big with ample body and a great finish.
Obviously, I have huge plans which remain under wraps – loose lips sink ships you know; they’re not great in the bedroom either. Of course, I’ll miss you all madly but, on the other hand, I won’t miss the weekly grind of bashing out this nonsense every Friday.
So, move over hairy-arsed folk with beards and ill-fitting T-shirts – and you blokes as well – as of this morning, Foxy Over A Barrel is unleashing its first sub-brand. Ladies, gentlemen and anyone in between, I give you Den’ Duraka.
You can now follow Foxy on Twitter and Instagram (although don’t expect too much)
