Why XXXL Fizzo is way bigger than little ol’ Campaign

foxy 414With just seven days to go until the DM Girls’ Getaway, it is fair to say that the excitement is building faster than a greased pig – not that I am referring to my colleagues on that, you understand, I am by far the heftiest of the lot, and proud of it.

In fact, Roxy has now crowned me Fizzo – apparently an amalgamation of Foxy and Lizzo – but hey I can take it. “You’re by my side, I don’t need no wish. I love you, bitch.”

Down in darkest Twickenham, however, it seems everything is getting much, much smaller; almost anorexic you might say, after adland’s favourite wank mag Campaign announced that it was finally shutting down its print edition, to, er, “increase its investment in its award-winning digital journalism”.

Bless ‘em. I have to say, just like most of their readers, they are masters of bullshit. Then again, let’s not forget this is the print magazine which once lauded Nigel “no Coutts bank account anymore for you, you prick” Farage.

Yep, just in case your memory is shot, it went something like this: “Nigel Farage is an impressive marketer and storyteller whose simple, focused and repetitive messaging enshrines some smart strategic practices. Even as so many despise his views, they admire his approach.”

Anyway, back to the revamp and “the focus on digital, which will include a major website redesign, reflects audience habits as Campaign’s online subscriber base has grown significantly since before the pandemic”.

So, I decided to do a little digging. (Well, look at the stats they push out for advertisers, anyway.) So, they claim to have 819,000 monthly unique users and 1.9 million monthly page views. Sounds impressive doesn’t it? But when you break that down it actually means readers look at just over two pages a month each.

Then they claim to have a social audience of 1.06 million. Again, sounds impressive doesn’t it? But when you look into it, something doesn’t quite add up. So, they have 224,000 Twitter followers, 78,000 Instagram followers, 37,000 on Facebook, 13,000 on YouTube and 41,000 on LinkedIn, which actually adds up to 393,000; not quite the 1.06 million then and no doubt most of them follow on multiple platforms too.

Of course, here at Decision Marketing we make no such claims. We have never won a single award. We don’t enter them. And, as we don’t have a paywall, we actually have a global audience of 5.18 billion Internet users. All we’ve got to do now is get some of them to read this shite…

You can now follow Foxy on Twitter and Instagram (if you’re desperate)