Back with a bang (hopefully)…

Bloody hell, I’m glad that’s over. Two months in The Priory is enough to drive even the Pope to drink, let alone us mere mortals. And having spent the whole summer drinking expensive tap water and chanting “I will not imbibe, I will not imbibe”, I was ready for a right old session by the time I got out, I can tell you.
Still, I read that my niece Busty has been keeping you all entertained with her tales of Tarquin Farquhar and the promise of a Busty Bonus. Well I say niece; she’s more like an old family friend really. And I know you’ll believe me when I say one of her Bonuses is worth two in the bush, so to speak.
So, dear readers, have you missed me? More importantly, is there anyone at your company who hasn’t returned from summer holiday yet? As you probably know, for Rapp London boss Pete Mitchell it is a very, very long summer break, as he is now surplus to requirements.
But, as a fine upstanding citizen of Croydon town, it does make you wonder what on earth he will be doing with himself on gardening leave until March… Of course, when John Watson left what was then WWAV, he got a year’s gardening leave – but his garden covered most of West Sussex, so I doubt he was complaining. A couple of hours spent in Croydon is normally enough to spark a riot – so, good luck Pete.
One man who will be celebrating this week is my old chum Steve “my hair is more coiffeured than Nicky Clark” Aldridge, on account of Partners Andrews Aldridge retaining the Rolls-Royce DM business. Speculation that he was forced to sell both his Lamborghinis, the Porsche, the BMW and the Aston Martin “runaround” to persuade Rolls that he was committed to their brand has been dismissed as vicious rumour. One agency source explained: “Put it this way, the 300 grand he’s shelled out for that Phantom will be worth it in the end.”
Talking of phantoms. Did you know that Lloyd James – the man behind (oo’er missus) one of the most haunted houses in Britain, Boys Hall – used to do a drag act with someone who still works in direct marketing? Thing is, I am desperate to get to the (ho hum) bottom of this story but apparently he refuses to spill the beans.
So come on all you lot who work for Lloyd…we need to know who it is!