Doncha just love half-term? Pesky kids and bickering parents everywhere you look? Packing out the trains…trying to get into our pubs at lunchtime…Bah, I’ll be glad when they all get back to school.
As you can maybe tell, I’m not in a particularly good mood this week. To be honest, it’s been a rather annoying seven days all round.
It didn’t start too well when I got a rather nasty letter from the lawyers at L’Oreal telling me to “stop and desist” from using their name for my new women’s group, Lassies Of the Regions Against London. No sooner had I started gathering those lucrative annual subscriptions – thanks girls – than I found myself having to shell out on my own lawyer. Sadly, it seems, we’re not worth it after all.
My second bit of bad news – and one that brought a tear to my eye – is that the lovely Jeremy Lee has finally thrown in the towel at Campaign to go freelance. Now there are some – well, nearly everyone at Haymarket – who claim Jezza is my deep-throat at Haymarket, who loves nothing better than dishing the dirt on his superiors.
However, as lovely as he is, even Jezza can’t provide me with these golden nuggets. I’m afraid my mole is much, much higher up in the business…
Still, I guess the writing has been on the wall for our man ever since the svelte queen of adland returned to her rightful place at the helm of the industry’s wank mag. Sadly for Jezza, his “bromance” with Danny “rogering” Rogers had put him firmly in the wrong camp, especially when it was cruelly cut short by Danny being forced back to PR Week – despite a begging letter asking Martin “little big man” Sorrell to intervene.
At the time, Jezza posted online that he needed a “stiff drink…straight out of the bottle”. And it was hardly surprising. After all, this is the man who allegedly once told Claire Beale to fuck off in front of the whole team. Sloppy.
Now his antics are legendary, although this being a family publication I am prevented from spilling most of the beans. But one of my favourites has to be that time on the Aurora Marketing Forum when Jezza got so pissed with my esteemed editor that he poured a whole pint over some pompous agency bloke – nice one fella.
I guess they just don’t make them like that anymore. Further proof, if it was needed, was the video of Marketing Week’s relaunch, er, party posted on its website earlier this week. Now back in the day that would’ve been a proper do – with an alcohol bill to match and a fight at the end – but this excuse for a shindig looked more like a wake.
It’s enough to turn you to drink. Talking of which, I must find out where Jezza’s leaving bash is going to be – that’ll definitely end with a bang.
You can also follow Busty on Twitter @BustyIdol
Oh Busty, I’m afraid that you’re esteemed editor has fed you a pack of lies – I expect he’s probably trying to get in your knickers. While I am indeed lovely, the rest is completely untrue. You want to lay off the Lambrini, love.
My editor, a liar? Surely not! Maybe you can tell me the real story over a nice glass of bubbly.