“Summertime and the livin’ is easy, fish are jumpin’ and the cotton is high.” Sing that Ella Fitzgerald classic often enough and you never know, it may well happen soon. I’ve been singing it all week, and after my Grand National winnings-inspired shopping spree sorted out my summer wardrobe, all we need now is a bit of nice weather.
Oh I do love a skimpy outfit; I also love getting a new man to peel it off. And, having bitten off and spat out my Victor Chandler man Steve, I’m in the market again – it was good while it lasted but even I don’t want to go to a race-meeting every week.
You know what they say; a new wardrobe deserves a new man, so, I was scouring online dating sites looking for someone who might match my extensive list of requirements, when one particular article caught my eye.
According to a study by the National Academy of Sciences of the United States of America, “compelling evidence from many animal taxa indicates that male genitalia are often under postcopulatory sexual selection for characteristics that increase a male’s success.”
In other words, tall blokes with big cocks are far more attractive. Now, I’m no boffin, but did they really need to do a study on that? All they had to do was ask us girls and we would’ve given them the answer straight-away.
Talking of tall men, it was nice to see those bastions of self-confidence, Tim Hipperson and Dave Harris, start new jobs this week.
And good old ‘Hippo’ wasted no time in telling the marketing world he was back, either. Just three days into his new job, Tim – never one to resist blowing his own trumpet – was telling Media Week, “I believe in a simple principle: that great people attract great clients and in partnership produce great work.” In other words, “I’m great, me”.
Dave, for once, was slightly less bullish, talking about how he was looking forward to “supporting the team” and all that. Mind you, he did add that he was looking forward to “enhancing their offering”. I bet he is.
My very own “postcopulatory sexual selection” process has been working overtime. With their air of unflinching self-confidence, undoubted charm and six-foot-plus frames, little ol’ Busty reckons there’s no doubt that Dave and Hippo are, er, I mean have, massive dicks…
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