“Chestnuts roasting on an open fire, Jack Frost nipping at your nose, Yuletide carols being sung by a choir, And folks dressed up like Eskimos.” Well, I’m not too sure about Eskimos – in fact I’m not too sure you’re even allowed to say that now – but I am definitely full of festive cheer.
There has been a golden shower of presents pouring into DecisionMarketing Towers, although to be honest my esteemed editor appears to have poured most of them down his fat neck already.
And now “Mad Friday” is upon us, like every other office in the country we are off to our Christmas lunch. God help me. As usual old McKelvey is using the occasion as an excuse to butter up a potential advertiser, so I have been forced to raid my festive Agent Provocateur wardrobe to seal the deal.
Today I will be mostly flashing my Whip-Me Stockings, Di-Di Suspenders, and Annoushka bra so expect a massive ad campaign to be appearing on this site very, very soon.
But never mind Mad Friday, it was certainly Mad Tuesday this week when we got our Christmas message from BBD Perfect Storm. I thought I was broad-minded, but even little ol’ Busty wasn’t quite prepared for Jason Foo dressed up as Kim Kardashian and being shagged on a bike, re-enacting Kanye West’s Bound 2 video.
Thing is, it looks like he’s enjoying it a little too much, too. To borrow some of the lyrics from the song, “I wanna f**k you hard on the sink. After that, give you something to drink. Step back, can’t get spunk on the mink. I mean damn, what on earth will your clients think?”
How do you follow that? Well, of course, there is only one way and that is by joining in the annual Busty Christmas sing-a-long of course. So, all together now…
Christmas time, mistletoe and wine,
In my whip-me stockings, and I’m feeling fine,
The turkey’s been stuffed, by Mr Lida, you see,
And now he’s turning his attention to me.
A time for fun, a time for joy,
There’s presents galore and a brand new toy,
He’s full of excitment, and I know what he’s after,
I’m going to play slave and he’ll be the master.
Christmas time, mistletoe and wine,
In my whip-me stockings and I’m feeling fine,
The turkey’s been stuffed, by Mr Lida, you see,
And now he’s turning his attention to me.
Christmas time, mistletoe and wine,
Here comes Santa and he’s bang on time,
One at the front and one from behind,
Now that’s what I call a jolly Christmas time.
A time for giving, a time for receiving,
I’m in ecstasy, their faces are beaming,
With all of this row, the neighbours won’t get peace,
I really do hope, this day will never cease.
Christmas time, mistletoe and wine,
Rudolf has joined us, and that is my sign,
To wish you all cheer, to wish you Christmas joy.
I’ve got to dash and play with my boys…
Have a good one. See you next year xx
You can also follow Busty on Twitter @BustyIdol
