Ouch and double ouch. You’ll have to forgive me if I seem slightly sensitive this week. Ouch again. You see I have the hangover from hell on account of the fact that I have just woken up from my Uncle Ivan’s “welcome back from the Priory” party.
Me and my big mouth – it was supposed to be hush, hush. Ah well, the truth will out and all that. Actually I went to visit him a few times and you would be quite surprised how many faces I recognised. No celebs, of course, just most of the DMA board…Mind you, having listened to Andrew Neil’s dirge about the Chinese invasion at this year’s Summer Lunch, most of us were driven to drink.
Thing is many of you have been demanding to know where Ivan’s been; some have even been demanding his return to this column because you are not keen on my dirty talk (no Busty Bonus for you then).
Well, I am pleased to reveal that Ivan will be back next week. He was actually supposed to be writing this one but you should see the state of him…After a month off the booze his hangover is even worse than mine.
Anyway, I am now in training for the Data Strategy Awards. Yep, would you believe they are still running, even though the magazine doesn’t exist and it hasn’t actually got an editor any more? Roll on October 19th I say…although, according to an email I got this week, apparently “the tables are selling really quickly”.
Er, now call me old-fashioned but if the tables are selling that quickly why are they emailing everyone to try to sell more. Then again, I suppose they can’t really send out an email saying “no-one wants to come to this year’s Data Strategy Awards, so PLEASE, we beg you, book a table otherwise we might have to cancel the event!”
Mind you, I hear Centaur Media specialises in this sort of stuff. Last week it revealed a pre-tax loss of £30m and called its results “encouraging”. God knows what it will say if it ever makes a profit.
Anyway, dear readers, it’s time for me to hang up my pen. It’s been a pleasure; to be fair it always is with me. See you next time Ivan goes “away”…
